It gets easier.

Hi guys,

For those who've been stalking my Instagram over the past three weeks, you know there has been some bumps but I haven't been completely honest; there were lots and lots of bumps.

In February this year, I surpassed my goal weight of 129lbs and over summer I slowly put on about 5lbs just from it being summer, putting me back to my goal weight of 129lbs which is still okay.

I was at my happiest and skinniest in about February time this year and felt okay over summer, still working out and eating clean as much as possible.

At the beginning of September, a week before I went to university for my second year, something bad happened which got my head spinning and every night I would binge out. When I went to university, I felt okay, I felt like my body was rewarding me and not letting me put the weight on.

For the two weeks after that, I was a freshers helper at my university which involved me getting drunk every night and getting free pizza every day.

The binges were not as bad as they could have been because I was still health concious and there were days when I said no to pizza and no to alcohol and ate well but the majority of the time I was enjoying myself, and I now understand that is okay. I was expecting this and I was expecting to put a little weight back on so that was okay but as I sat, a week ago, three weeks in to pizza, alcohol and chocolate I felt and saw the weight. There are times when I just sat and cried because I felt like I'd wasted two years of my life in two weeks.

Now, as I sit a week later, I've drunk over 4 litres of water every day, ate clean and worked out (not as much as I could have as I'm still a little bit lazy hehe) I feel a lot better.

At the beginning of this week I literally felt hopeless and lonely and helpless, it was a disgusting, disgusting feeling. For the first couple of days of getting back to clean, I struggled a lot and was so so so so close to reaching for cereal or picking up chocolate in Tesco but I didn't, and because I didn't, I sit now fifty times happier than I was.

I'm writing this blog post to say that if at this moment you feel helpless, you feel like you are never going to get skinny, you feel like no guy will ever look at you, you feel lonely, you feel like nothing good will ever happen, you feel like you will never make progress, you feel like people stare at you at the gym because you're too fat to be there, I AM HERE TO TELL YOU I WAS THERE, I FELT THAT WAY AND I AM HERE TO TELL YOU THAT IT GET'S BETTER, ALL OF THESE THINGS ARE IN YOUR HEAD AND YOU WILL MAKE PROGRESS, YOU WILL GET BETTER, YOU JUST NEED TO WORK FOR IT TODAY.

You need to put down the chocolate TODAY, you need to pick up fruit and vegetables instead.

You need to go and workout TODAY, NOT tomorrow, you are only one workout away from a good mood, I promise you.

That week when I felt down my stomach kept saying start tomorrow but I knew in my head that I needed to start TODAY in order to get progress and I did.

I'm going to be honest and say last week I weighed myself and I was back at 140lbs, I am going to weigh myself every two weeks to see my progress and I AM going to get back down to 125lbs, when I was at my happiest and I know it will not take me as long as I might think.

You must think postively. You must start today. You must believe in yourself.

You need to trust the process and know that it might take some time, BUT IT WILL BE WORTH IT.

Carbs after lunch? A travesty!

Hi guys,
Haven't posted in a while and I always say I'm going to on my Instagram but end up not doing it, but here I am anyway (procrastinating from studying French verb conjugations).  Just before I begin I am not a nutritionist in any way and I don't know if all if this is 100% correct (and please correct me if any of this information is wrong) but this is what I've taken from the articles and things I've read (reliable sources FYI).

Today I'm going to write about something I'm going to try over the next couple of weeks/months to see how it works for me. Recently, I've been reading a lot on carb-back loading (google it, too hard to explain but basically eating all carbs for and after dinner) and the way our body actually works instead of listening to things written in fashion magazines.

There's a lot of evidence to show when our body stores the macronutrients as fat. What I've taken from it is that carbs are needed after lifting heavily to restore muscles (and many other things) and whilst your insulin levels are high, your body does not store carbohydrates as fat.
Basically, eating carbs after working out is a good thing, and the prime time to do this workout is late afternoon/early evenings, so eat carbs after that.
Your body does not actually need carbs before your workout, you get as much energy (if not more, I feel) from protein and fats and I feel I perform better if I don't eat carbs before working out.

It's seriously seriously hard for my head to comprehend the fact that I shouldn't eat carbs in the morning but actually at night and the idea really scares me. The media has punched it in to my head to not eat them after lunch but science shows this is bullshit and I think it's worth trying.

Another thing I've taken from it is the difference between low-glycemic food (brown rice, sweet potato, avacado, certain fruits, 'good carbs' etc) and high-glycemic food (white potatoes, white rice etc) and when they should be taken. After working out, it is actually beneficial for your body to eat high glycemic foods and in the carb-back loading diet, you are allowed anything you want; cakes, pastries, ANYTHING.

Really good article which is the basis of the diet/workout regime I'm going to follow over the next few months:
http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/kelly3.htm

Example of the stupidest article of all time:
http://goaskalice.columbia.edu/does-carbohydrate-become-body-fat
She has no scientific basis on what she is saying and it's bullshit, please don't listen to this shit.
And I know, why should you listen to me? To be honest, you shouldn't really, but this is scientific information I'm basing this on, I have read up on this with actual scientific articles and studies behind the information, I amen't making it up. If you're still unsure, please please read up on it. The media are giving us this information which is so so wrong and it's the reason why I'm not where I should be.

I just wanted to let you guys know what I'm up to and the stuff I've learned recently. Hopefully I'll write an update post about it soon and hopefully it gets results!